This might be really short because I really don’t want to talk about it. I now haven’t had a good race in a year. Crown King last year was my last good race. I’ll be honest – I am crying now just thinking about that fact. Ok – let’s back track.
Most people know that I really wanted to break the record at Crown King. It’s a pretty serious record, held by Ann Trason. I had some moments were I doubted my ability, but as the date came closer I felt good. All of my workouts had gone really well. For two weeks before the race I got 9 hours of sleep every night. I knew what I had to do and I really felt like I could do it. I didn’t even have my normal pre race nerves in the days leading up to the race. Yes, anything can go wrong, but I believed in my training.
I also had told myself this would be my last year at Crown King. Three years in a row seemed enough. There are other races that I want to do. And really, how many times do you try. I just felt like I needed to give it one more try and move on.
I am mostly vegan. I am going to share a secret with you. I eat red meat every Sunday. A few years back I noticed that I was having major energy problems, especially when I was having my period. Iron pills make me so sick to my stomach. So every Sunday I scarf down some form of red meat really fast and try not to think about what I am eating. And it worked. I had my period the week before Crown King. I bought roast to cook in spaghetti sauce and planned to eat it all week. Except I couldn’t. I got sick just thinking about it. No red meat for me.
On Friday morning, Sinjin woke up sick. He ended up throwing up and I ended up stressed about getting sick. I tried to help him, but made Ava and Norm do any direct care of him.
I woke up Saturday morning and felt good. I even woke up at 3:45 am before the alarm went off feeling well rested. I didn’t feel any nerves until we got to Lake Pleasant. I just felt really positive. Off we went. And I felt like I had no energy. I wasn’t too worried. I was truly born to run long distances. I never really enjoy running until about mile 10 or so. It takes at least until mile 5 before I feel like I might possibly enjoy what is going on. So my initial low energy wasn’t too worrisome. Just make it to mile five I thought, than you’ll feel better. But I was wrong. By mile six I knew I was in serious trouble. I was working too hard to keep a pace that should have felt easy. And my right buttock was feeling like something had hit me hard there. With each mile it was getting worse not better. Mile 7.5 passed and I looked at my watch. Just keep this pace and everything is fine for breaking the record. I needed to stay at my current pace until 15.5 and then I could drop to 10 minute miles to break the record. But I didn’t keep my pace. I couldn’t. Ok – so forget breaking the record. Just hold on to first place. I kept telling myself to fight, but I knew I was in trouble. I remember how good I felt last year and I was not feeling that way this year.
At the aid station at 15.5 I was passed by a woman. Not long after leaving that aid station I was passed by Angela Shartel. At some point in here Jay Danek came from behind and tried to encourage me to stay with him. He was chatting with me, but I just didn’t care. I was in a lot of pain and going uphill was the most painful. At the aid station at mile 19 I asked about dropping out. While waiting for an answer I was passed again. An answer finally came – it would be 2 or 3 hours before I could get a ride and that ride would take me back to the start. But my family was at the finish. I decided to keep going. I told myself that comebacks happen. You never know what is happening ahead of you. I tried with all my might to fight, but the pain in my butt was too much. Nadine came up from behind me and asked how if I was okay. This is when I lost it. No I answered as I started crying. She stopped to hug me. Don’t stop I said, keep going.
All this time I had dreams of getting a ride on one of the ATV’s or motorbikes. I just wanted off this course. And then an ATV pulls up and stops. Want a ride? YES!!! Another runner had heard me asking about quitting at the last aid station. He too wanted to quit, but he had a friend that was out on the course on his Rhino. Luckily the friend had pulled up next to him and now they were picking me up. OMG! I can’t tell you how happy this made me. If there was one positive to this day – this ride was it. We had fun as we talked and laughed. The ride was so much fun! There was a lot of water on the course. And for the first time in three years I got to really enjoy the beauty of the course.
So we arrive at Crown King and I see Norm. Norm I yell. He just stares at me and I have to wave him over as I take my bib number off. Later he tells me he was really confused as to why I was just standing there. In his head he was thinking, you’re second woman, cross the finish line already!
I was pissed and sad. Sinjin was still sick (when we get home I realize he is running a really high fever) and so we just get in the car and take off. Leaving Crown King requires about 30 miles of driving on a mostly one lane dirt road with a lot of blind turns. About 10 miles from the I-17 I say, Oh Shit - we told Cristian we would give him a ride. We turn around and drive back to get Cristian. We talk to a few people, grab Cristian and head back to Phoenix.
I know, not a lot of detail. I’m just not in the mood. It feels like a bad dream that I can’t wake up from. I am registered to run Zane Grey in 4 weeks and I am feeling very unsure about that. I will be totally honest and say I’m unsure about my future as a runner. I am not in a good place.
Most people know that I really wanted to break the record at Crown King. It’s a pretty serious record, held by Ann Trason. I had some moments were I doubted my ability, but as the date came closer I felt good. All of my workouts had gone really well. For two weeks before the race I got 9 hours of sleep every night. I knew what I had to do and I really felt like I could do it. I didn’t even have my normal pre race nerves in the days leading up to the race. Yes, anything can go wrong, but I believed in my training.
I also had told myself this would be my last year at Crown King. Three years in a row seemed enough. There are other races that I want to do. And really, how many times do you try. I just felt like I needed to give it one more try and move on.
I am mostly vegan. I am going to share a secret with you. I eat red meat every Sunday. A few years back I noticed that I was having major energy problems, especially when I was having my period. Iron pills make me so sick to my stomach. So every Sunday I scarf down some form of red meat really fast and try not to think about what I am eating. And it worked. I had my period the week before Crown King. I bought roast to cook in spaghetti sauce and planned to eat it all week. Except I couldn’t. I got sick just thinking about it. No red meat for me.
On Friday morning, Sinjin woke up sick. He ended up throwing up and I ended up stressed about getting sick. I tried to help him, but made Ava and Norm do any direct care of him.
I woke up Saturday morning and felt good. I even woke up at 3:45 am before the alarm went off feeling well rested. I didn’t feel any nerves until we got to Lake Pleasant. I just felt really positive. Off we went. And I felt like I had no energy. I wasn’t too worried. I was truly born to run long distances. I never really enjoy running until about mile 10 or so. It takes at least until mile 5 before I feel like I might possibly enjoy what is going on. So my initial low energy wasn’t too worrisome. Just make it to mile five I thought, than you’ll feel better. But I was wrong. By mile six I knew I was in serious trouble. I was working too hard to keep a pace that should have felt easy. And my right buttock was feeling like something had hit me hard there. With each mile it was getting worse not better. Mile 7.5 passed and I looked at my watch. Just keep this pace and everything is fine for breaking the record. I needed to stay at my current pace until 15.5 and then I could drop to 10 minute miles to break the record. But I didn’t keep my pace. I couldn’t. Ok – so forget breaking the record. Just hold on to first place. I kept telling myself to fight, but I knew I was in trouble. I remember how good I felt last year and I was not feeling that way this year.
At the aid station at 15.5 I was passed by a woman. Not long after leaving that aid station I was passed by Angela Shartel. At some point in here Jay Danek came from behind and tried to encourage me to stay with him. He was chatting with me, but I just didn’t care. I was in a lot of pain and going uphill was the most painful. At the aid station at mile 19 I asked about dropping out. While waiting for an answer I was passed again. An answer finally came – it would be 2 or 3 hours before I could get a ride and that ride would take me back to the start. But my family was at the finish. I decided to keep going. I told myself that comebacks happen. You never know what is happening ahead of you. I tried with all my might to fight, but the pain in my butt was too much. Nadine came up from behind me and asked how if I was okay. This is when I lost it. No I answered as I started crying. She stopped to hug me. Don’t stop I said, keep going.
All this time I had dreams of getting a ride on one of the ATV’s or motorbikes. I just wanted off this course. And then an ATV pulls up and stops. Want a ride? YES!!! Another runner had heard me asking about quitting at the last aid station. He too wanted to quit, but he had a friend that was out on the course on his Rhino. Luckily the friend had pulled up next to him and now they were picking me up. OMG! I can’t tell you how happy this made me. If there was one positive to this day – this ride was it. We had fun as we talked and laughed. The ride was so much fun! There was a lot of water on the course. And for the first time in three years I got to really enjoy the beauty of the course.
So we arrive at Crown King and I see Norm. Norm I yell. He just stares at me and I have to wave him over as I take my bib number off. Later he tells me he was really confused as to why I was just standing there. In his head he was thinking, you’re second woman, cross the finish line already!
I was pissed and sad. Sinjin was still sick (when we get home I realize he is running a really high fever) and so we just get in the car and take off. Leaving Crown King requires about 30 miles of driving on a mostly one lane dirt road with a lot of blind turns. About 10 miles from the I-17 I say, Oh Shit - we told Cristian we would give him a ride. We turn around and drive back to get Cristian. We talk to a few people, grab Cristian and head back to Phoenix.
I know, not a lot of detail. I’m just not in the mood. It feels like a bad dream that I can’t wake up from. I am registered to run Zane Grey in 4 weeks and I am feeling very unsure about that. I will be totally honest and say I’m unsure about my future as a runner. I am not in a good place.
