Monday:
We decided to run to Montecito Heights today on the bike path, but we also had to be back to get the kids to Anime Expo. With about a half mile to go we had to turn around to get home on time. Where you drop down to the run off canal it becomes hard concrete. This is my least favorite running surface. We ran a bit faster today because I have seen all of this and it’s no longer taking everything in for the first time.
Ava isn’t going to Anima Expo on tahe final day. I was making plans to travel to the mountains and do some awesome run when Sinjin told me he needs to be at Anime Expo at 9am to do someone’s make up. This trip has been all about the internet friends.
I know, I know, if you are my age you think that an internet friend is someone trying to lure you away from home so they can do terrible things to you. But kids today usually skype or use their camera in some way. They can see who they are talking with. And I can see who they are talking with. Last year we came to LA and were able to meet Ava’s friend Katie (and her parents). We did a nice meet up at the mall and all went well and no one was creepy. This year we rented a house 2 blocks from Katie’s house and the girls went to Anime Expo together and had sleep overs. Sinjin is meeting a friend he made online at Anime Expo. The first day we met before and they were able to chat, etc. Noon seemed like a perfectly nice kid. Today we are planning to meet again and then have coffee or dinner tonight.
It’s different for kids today. For one thing, my kids are homeschooled. Sinjin takes classes online so these online people really are his school friends. Also, my kids have chosen paths that aren’t necessarily the traditional or “normal” path and they are able to meet people who also have similar interests or have also taken a unique path to schooling or just growing up in general. This is not to stay that creepy things never happen. Some dude recently tried to get Ava to give him private information and she turned him in and told me about it. These kids grew up with this so they know what they are doing, We joke around my house sometimes, “oh a new friend, did you give them your address and social security number? Directions to the house and hours you are alone?” But it is a joke. I know my kids are careful about what goes into a picture (never your address numbers) and what information they give out. Part of that is because when they were young I harassed them about it ALL THE TIME!
Feel free to question my parenting skills (to yourself, not to me). My ex-husband probably started a club you can join. But in the mean time, things seem to be working out okay.
Tuesday:
We woke up and I just couldn't muster the motivation to run through this neighborhood one more time. Yes, the Arroyo Seco path is nice, but been there, done that. Also this neighborhood is stressful to run through. We decided to lounge around and go for a walk mid morning. I really don’t need to run every day or mileage will go from not much to a lot too quickly. I don’t really follow the 10 percent rule, but I do try to avoid making huge leaps, like doubling my mileage.
Occidental College is a mile from the house we rented. We decided to walk over there. It is a beautiful campus! I want to go to school there! We loved walking through the campus. It was quiet as it was 4th of July and summer vacation, but there were a few groups of film students working. There were also families with small children, people working out and couples walking their dogs. It was an amazing respite in the middle of the city. The people who live in the community are lucky to have access to such an amazing place. I want to go back and sit under the tress and read my book. In case you can’t tell, I just loved it!
We decided to run to Montecito Heights today on the bike path, but we also had to be back to get the kids to Anime Expo. With about a half mile to go we had to turn around to get home on time. Where you drop down to the run off canal it becomes hard concrete. This is my least favorite running surface. We ran a bit faster today because I have seen all of this and it’s no longer taking everything in for the first time.
Ava isn’t going to Anima Expo on tahe final day. I was making plans to travel to the mountains and do some awesome run when Sinjin told me he needs to be at Anime Expo at 9am to do someone’s make up. This trip has been all about the internet friends.
I know, I know, if you are my age you think that an internet friend is someone trying to lure you away from home so they can do terrible things to you. But kids today usually skype or use their camera in some way. They can see who they are talking with. And I can see who they are talking with. Last year we came to LA and were able to meet Ava’s friend Katie (and her parents). We did a nice meet up at the mall and all went well and no one was creepy. This year we rented a house 2 blocks from Katie’s house and the girls went to Anime Expo together and had sleep overs. Sinjin is meeting a friend he made online at Anime Expo. The first day we met before and they were able to chat, etc. Noon seemed like a perfectly nice kid. Today we are planning to meet again and then have coffee or dinner tonight.
It’s different for kids today. For one thing, my kids are homeschooled. Sinjin takes classes online so these online people really are his school friends. Also, my kids have chosen paths that aren’t necessarily the traditional or “normal” path and they are able to meet people who also have similar interests or have also taken a unique path to schooling or just growing up in general. This is not to stay that creepy things never happen. Some dude recently tried to get Ava to give him private information and she turned him in and told me about it. These kids grew up with this so they know what they are doing, We joke around my house sometimes, “oh a new friend, did you give them your address and social security number? Directions to the house and hours you are alone?” But it is a joke. I know my kids are careful about what goes into a picture (never your address numbers) and what information they give out. Part of that is because when they were young I harassed them about it ALL THE TIME!
Feel free to question my parenting skills (to yourself, not to me). My ex-husband probably started a club you can join. But in the mean time, things seem to be working out okay.
Tuesday:
We woke up and I just couldn't muster the motivation to run through this neighborhood one more time. Yes, the Arroyo Seco path is nice, but been there, done that. Also this neighborhood is stressful to run through. We decided to lounge around and go for a walk mid morning. I really don’t need to run every day or mileage will go from not much to a lot too quickly. I don’t really follow the 10 percent rule, but I do try to avoid making huge leaps, like doubling my mileage.
Occidental College is a mile from the house we rented. We decided to walk over there. It is a beautiful campus! I want to go to school there! We loved walking through the campus. It was quiet as it was 4th of July and summer vacation, but there were a few groups of film students working. There were also families with small children, people working out and couples walking their dogs. It was an amazing respite in the middle of the city. The people who live in the community are lucky to have access to such an amazing place. I want to go back and sit under the tress and read my book. In case you can’t tell, I just loved it!
The track
Walking through campus
The view from the parking lot for the dorms
Wednesday:
I had seen someone running behind Occidental College yesterday and looked on the map when we got home. It appeared that there were trails back there that I wanted to find. We ran back to Occidental College, but this time ran Campus Road around the outside of the college instead of going through campus. Where the road ends there is a foot path, the high school and some hills with trail. Heading to try to get on the trail we encountered a large homeless camp right away. But what kept us from trying to figure out where to go were the needles littering the ground. I want to remind you again that this is right behind the high school! I grew up in Houston, I am a big city girl and I know I shouldn’t be shocked by this, but I am. We decided to run a different way and headed in a direction that we hoped would get us back to the house.
When we got back to the house we cleaned up and headed to Donut Friend. Vegan donut heaven! They do also have a gluten free donut, but if you are allergic you probably shouldn't eat it as it goes in the same fryer and there is gluten every where in the kitchen. These donuts were amazing! They aren’t just donuts, They are little dessert creations. I ate so much sugar I will be sick, but it was totally worth it!
We cleaned up the house, packed up our things and headed to Sacramento. It is such a long boring drive. Also, I think we should focus less on making people learn the DUI rules and teaching them how to actually drive. The left hand lane is for passing. It is not for driving slow. Or keeping me from driving fast. If people would just pass and then move back to the right hand lane, everything would be fine. I should not be using my breaks that much on the Interstate! And when you force people to pass you on the right, it isn’t safe. Oh, and in case you were wondering, the Prius C doesn’t really care to go over 92 mph.
The Air BNB in Sacramento is in a lovely area! I have run CIM twice, both times a disaster and I have decided this race hates me and I will never come back. But I did always want to bring Norm and the kids here. Mid town is such a beautiful area. And I love any place where I can walk everywhere.
This is the first time that we have stayed in an Air BNB that is clearly some one’s home and not rental/vacation property. It’s very weird. She has so much food in the fridge that I almost couldn't fit in two days of groceries for us. It just isn't as relaxing to feel like you are in some one’s space. Oddly, I went back to look at the listing to see what other reviewers had said and it says the place is no longer listed. We might be her one and done. Oh well, if this is the worst Air BNB experience that we have, I won't complain.
I have made up a story for this girl. I think she was going to move in with her boyfriend and listed this place to make some money. That would explain why there are no clothes here. But the reason her personal stuff, deoderant, shampoo, etc. Is still here is that she already had duplicates at his house because she didn't want to schlep everything around town. The food in the fridge is because it hasn't been going well she says she is going out with a friend, but really she comes back here. And she can't very well go home hungry if she said she was eating with a friend! The reason the listing is down is because the moving in thing is not working out she needs to come back. I don't know if any of this is true, but it’s totally plausible.
I had seen someone running behind Occidental College yesterday and looked on the map when we got home. It appeared that there were trails back there that I wanted to find. We ran back to Occidental College, but this time ran Campus Road around the outside of the college instead of going through campus. Where the road ends there is a foot path, the high school and some hills with trail. Heading to try to get on the trail we encountered a large homeless camp right away. But what kept us from trying to figure out where to go were the needles littering the ground. I want to remind you again that this is right behind the high school! I grew up in Houston, I am a big city girl and I know I shouldn’t be shocked by this, but I am. We decided to run a different way and headed in a direction that we hoped would get us back to the house.
When we got back to the house we cleaned up and headed to Donut Friend. Vegan donut heaven! They do also have a gluten free donut, but if you are allergic you probably shouldn't eat it as it goes in the same fryer and there is gluten every where in the kitchen. These donuts were amazing! They aren’t just donuts, They are little dessert creations. I ate so much sugar I will be sick, but it was totally worth it!
We cleaned up the house, packed up our things and headed to Sacramento. It is such a long boring drive. Also, I think we should focus less on making people learn the DUI rules and teaching them how to actually drive. The left hand lane is for passing. It is not for driving slow. Or keeping me from driving fast. If people would just pass and then move back to the right hand lane, everything would be fine. I should not be using my breaks that much on the Interstate! And when you force people to pass you on the right, it isn’t safe. Oh, and in case you were wondering, the Prius C doesn’t really care to go over 92 mph.
The Air BNB in Sacramento is in a lovely area! I have run CIM twice, both times a disaster and I have decided this race hates me and I will never come back. But I did always want to bring Norm and the kids here. Mid town is such a beautiful area. And I love any place where I can walk everywhere.
This is the first time that we have stayed in an Air BNB that is clearly some one’s home and not rental/vacation property. It’s very weird. She has so much food in the fridge that I almost couldn't fit in two days of groceries for us. It just isn't as relaxing to feel like you are in some one’s space. Oddly, I went back to look at the listing to see what other reviewers had said and it says the place is no longer listed. We might be her one and done. Oh well, if this is the worst Air BNB experience that we have, I won't complain.
I have made up a story for this girl. I think she was going to move in with her boyfriend and listed this place to make some money. That would explain why there are no clothes here. But the reason her personal stuff, deoderant, shampoo, etc. Is still here is that she already had duplicates at his house because she didn't want to schlep everything around town. The food in the fridge is because it hasn't been going well she says she is going out with a friend, but really she comes back here. And she can't very well go home hungry if she said she was eating with a friend! The reason the listing is down is because the moving in thing is not working out she needs to come back. I don't know if any of this is true, but it’s totally plausible.
From top: Smorissey (relish), lemon poppy seed (very tart!), the most populate donut is the strawberry one and I can see why! Two chocolate dipped (boring) and the middle is a cinnamon and it was awesome.
Share the road California style
Welcome to Sacramento!
Thursday:
Okay, I want my LA kitchen back! But I am jumping the gun… Let me back up.
I didn't sleep well (I want my LA bed back as well). When I went to get in bed, it didn't seem like the sheets were clean. Too much hair. If you have long hair you know what I am talking about it. So I decided to just sleep on top of the duvet. It was pretty warm so I wasn’t cold, but I am one of those people who likes some heavy on top of me when I sleep. Probably because I am so high strung. I would probably benefit from wearing a weighted vest just all the time.
I was awake at 3am. Kinda fell asleep and at 6am was wide awake and hoping Norm would wake up soon He did. We got up to make coffee and realized that we forgot to buy sugar. She probably has sugar so we will just borrow a bit of her sugar. We find the sugar container but she is out of sugar.
Here is the difference between Norm and me. If I wanted sugar and there wasn’t any I would throw a huge hissy fit and storm around talking about how my day was ruined and everything always goes wrong for me and why do I even bother breathing! Norm would offer to go get sugar and I would say something like don’t bother I just won't have coffee. I hate my life. (See how much fun I am to live with?) Norm would then go get me sugar. I would drink my coffee and be all smiles and fun again.
But Norm just says oh well. (And no, I did not offer to go get him sugar.) Sits down and drinks his coffee. Which had to taste terrible to someone who usually puts 6 packets in at Starbucks. But then sitting at the table, he opens a small bowl and there is sugar, we think. Norm put a little on his finger and tastes it. “Cocaine?” I ask. “No, sugar.” He says with a laugh.
We head out for out run. Norm knows it is time to get ready when I am dressed and standing at the door giving him a look. We are only a mile from The American River so we head over there and hop on the trail. It was not what I had pictured. In my head I envisioned a beautiful and scenic run. Basically we were on the canal (if you live in Phoenix you know what this means) but the canal has better water views. It’s just a large gravel path. There are two levels to it. The lower level was shaded, but the upper level let us look at the backs of houses and peoples yards. We love judging what people have done with their homes even though we ourselves live in a complete shit hole. At about the 5 mile turn around we suddenly encountered a lot of people and huge fancy bridge. We would later discover this is part of Sacramento State University. We took a look around and headed back to the house. Some guy told us we looked fit (good G-D I hope so!) and then asked a bunch of questions about Western States. Norm I think enjoyed this run a lot because I declared that I would feel safe running here alone and he agreed and now he does not have to run with me tomorrow.
Later, we had to walk to the bank. We passed a homeless guy yelling at his homeless female partner about how he had an appointment and they needed to go and she was always making him late with her doddering around. So, even if you are homeless, you still fight about the same shit.
Friday:
Today was fast running so Norm got to skip training today. I was super duper quiet so as not to wake him. Of course I got my period so I was questioning my ability to run fast. I just know that the first day I always feel like I am running through knee deep mud. But I told myself to suck it up and get the work out done. 10 miles total with 2 miles of warm up and 7 miles of 6:50 or better with 1 mile easy home.
A friend of mine and I were texting about her workout the other day and she told me that her new coach has her running fast during her long runs. Gee, that sounds familiar! I have been telling her this for years! You are welcome to your opinion and I totally agree that not every thing works for every person, but I firmly believe you have to practice running fast during your long runs. Yes, track work outs are great (although when I was running my fastest times I had never been on a track), but if you want to run a long race fast doing a few miles fast on the track isn't going to cut it. Anyways, my friend was telling me that she was struggling a bit so I shared my mantra for long fast runs. I tell myself “this is how you get faster. Do you want to get faster? This is what you have to do.” It sounds cheesy, but it works.
Today I was using the mantra a lot! I got through 5 miles of 6:50 or better and thought screw this. I told myself I could slow down and I did, but I almost immediately fell back to 6:50 pace. And it felt effortless, unlike the last few miles where I felt like I was tight and fighting to hold pace. While this is ridiculous and annoying, it always reminds me that I am perfectly capable of the workout if I would just relax. It is when I stress about my ability that it all goes to crap.
After lunch I made everyone go to the Museum of Medical History. It’s small, but free. And pretty amazing. It was interesting to see everything. We then came home to binge watch tv.
Grand Canyon University called to see if I wanted to continue my PhD program. They also wanted to let me know that if I don't start up again by the end of the month I will get a whole new committee, which basically means starting over again. I very nicely told my advisor that I still have really bad feelings toward the university. That I am still convinced they just wanted my money and everything that had happened was on their side a way to continue to get money from me. I don’t think any one there actually cares if I finish or not. I just don’t see a light at the end of the tunnel if I continue there. I have thought about transferring, but right now I am really enjoying having some free time.
We have decided to skip the Utah trip. Enzo texts and calls me every day, he misses me. Brandi texts me every day. She misses me. When will I be there they want to know. We aren't supposed to be in Silverton until Wednesday and that is just for a quick overnight before going to Telluride. We decide to go to Silverton and spend a few days with them. We will drive as far as possible and spend the night and finish the drive to Silverton on Monday.
Okay, I want my LA kitchen back! But I am jumping the gun… Let me back up.
I didn't sleep well (I want my LA bed back as well). When I went to get in bed, it didn't seem like the sheets were clean. Too much hair. If you have long hair you know what I am talking about it. So I decided to just sleep on top of the duvet. It was pretty warm so I wasn’t cold, but I am one of those people who likes some heavy on top of me when I sleep. Probably because I am so high strung. I would probably benefit from wearing a weighted vest just all the time.
I was awake at 3am. Kinda fell asleep and at 6am was wide awake and hoping Norm would wake up soon He did. We got up to make coffee and realized that we forgot to buy sugar. She probably has sugar so we will just borrow a bit of her sugar. We find the sugar container but she is out of sugar.
Here is the difference between Norm and me. If I wanted sugar and there wasn’t any I would throw a huge hissy fit and storm around talking about how my day was ruined and everything always goes wrong for me and why do I even bother breathing! Norm would offer to go get sugar and I would say something like don’t bother I just won't have coffee. I hate my life. (See how much fun I am to live with?) Norm would then go get me sugar. I would drink my coffee and be all smiles and fun again.
But Norm just says oh well. (And no, I did not offer to go get him sugar.) Sits down and drinks his coffee. Which had to taste terrible to someone who usually puts 6 packets in at Starbucks. But then sitting at the table, he opens a small bowl and there is sugar, we think. Norm put a little on his finger and tastes it. “Cocaine?” I ask. “No, sugar.” He says with a laugh.
We head out for out run. Norm knows it is time to get ready when I am dressed and standing at the door giving him a look. We are only a mile from The American River so we head over there and hop on the trail. It was not what I had pictured. In my head I envisioned a beautiful and scenic run. Basically we were on the canal (if you live in Phoenix you know what this means) but the canal has better water views. It’s just a large gravel path. There are two levels to it. The lower level was shaded, but the upper level let us look at the backs of houses and peoples yards. We love judging what people have done with their homes even though we ourselves live in a complete shit hole. At about the 5 mile turn around we suddenly encountered a lot of people and huge fancy bridge. We would later discover this is part of Sacramento State University. We took a look around and headed back to the house. Some guy told us we looked fit (good G-D I hope so!) and then asked a bunch of questions about Western States. Norm I think enjoyed this run a lot because I declared that I would feel safe running here alone and he agreed and now he does not have to run with me tomorrow.
Later, we had to walk to the bank. We passed a homeless guy yelling at his homeless female partner about how he had an appointment and they needed to go and she was always making him late with her doddering around. So, even if you are homeless, you still fight about the same shit.
Friday:
Today was fast running so Norm got to skip training today. I was super duper quiet so as not to wake him. Of course I got my period so I was questioning my ability to run fast. I just know that the first day I always feel like I am running through knee deep mud. But I told myself to suck it up and get the work out done. 10 miles total with 2 miles of warm up and 7 miles of 6:50 or better with 1 mile easy home.
A friend of mine and I were texting about her workout the other day and she told me that her new coach has her running fast during her long runs. Gee, that sounds familiar! I have been telling her this for years! You are welcome to your opinion and I totally agree that not every thing works for every person, but I firmly believe you have to practice running fast during your long runs. Yes, track work outs are great (although when I was running my fastest times I had never been on a track), but if you want to run a long race fast doing a few miles fast on the track isn't going to cut it. Anyways, my friend was telling me that she was struggling a bit so I shared my mantra for long fast runs. I tell myself “this is how you get faster. Do you want to get faster? This is what you have to do.” It sounds cheesy, but it works.
Today I was using the mantra a lot! I got through 5 miles of 6:50 or better and thought screw this. I told myself I could slow down and I did, but I almost immediately fell back to 6:50 pace. And it felt effortless, unlike the last few miles where I felt like I was tight and fighting to hold pace. While this is ridiculous and annoying, it always reminds me that I am perfectly capable of the workout if I would just relax. It is when I stress about my ability that it all goes to crap.
After lunch I made everyone go to the Museum of Medical History. It’s small, but free. And pretty amazing. It was interesting to see everything. We then came home to binge watch tv.
Grand Canyon University called to see if I wanted to continue my PhD program. They also wanted to let me know that if I don't start up again by the end of the month I will get a whole new committee, which basically means starting over again. I very nicely told my advisor that I still have really bad feelings toward the university. That I am still convinced they just wanted my money and everything that had happened was on their side a way to continue to get money from me. I don’t think any one there actually cares if I finish or not. I just don’t see a light at the end of the tunnel if I continue there. I have thought about transferring, but right now I am really enjoying having some free time.
We have decided to skip the Utah trip. Enzo texts and calls me every day, he misses me. Brandi texts me every day. She misses me. When will I be there they want to know. We aren't supposed to be in Silverton until Wednesday and that is just for a quick overnight before going to Telluride. We decide to go to Silverton and spend a few days with them. We will drive as far as possible and spend the night and finish the drive to Silverton on Monday.
Who doesn't want to see a display of bed pans through the years?
Some exercises for Norm to do while still in bed. Genius!
Saturday:
I told Norm I wanted to get 15 miles done. He sounded dubious, but willing to give it a try. I always tell him that if he can't keep going to just tell me and we can cut it short. I was letting him set the pace since this is my easy day. And I definitely tend to run to fast on my easy days with out him to keep me in check. It’s not really an ego thing, more the fact that I know I could be done so much quicker.
During I run I commented to Norm that this trip nothing had really gone wrong so I should be having fun, but I wasn’t really. I will come to regret this.
We ran 12.5 miles and then walked 1.5 miles. Norm was doing great and ran about an 8:30 pace the whole time, but at 12.5 the wheels came off his wagon and he jumped on the struggle bus. Oh well, we had a nice chat and eventually arrived at the apartment.
Today we were driving to Auburn for Sinjin to meet a friend he had made online. If you were in judgment of my parenting before, get ready to shake your head thusly. This is a douzy of a tail. I actually thought about leaving it out. Partly because it is personal about Sinjin and partly because I look pretty bad, but I talk about my period all the time, might as well tell you about this. (FYI - Sinjin read this and gave his approval.)
I had lectured Sinjin about being safe. We were meeting in a public place. I would be close by. We meet Ell at the park in Auburn. We talked for a few minutes and she seemed sweet. I felt good after meeting her. The kids told me they were going to the farmer’s market and to get yogurt. The last thing I said to Sinjin was, “if I text you, you better answer.” He said yes and off we all went.
About 30 minutes after we left Sinjin I texted and asked if everything was okay. No response. I waited a bit and texted again. Nothing. I tried calling. No answer. Now I am starting to worry. Why isn't he answering his phone? I texted Ava and told her he wasn’t answering, could she try? Meanwhile Norm and I rush over to the farmer’s market. It’s been about an hour since we left him and no one can reach him. The farmer’s market is closing up and he is not there. I am in a panic at this point. I talk to Ava. We walk through downtown Aubrun. I don't see him. Do I go into every store? I look up the yogurt. Where is the yougurt shop? It says it is .65 miles a way. I tell Norm, “They didn't go get yogurt! Sinjin would never walk that far.” Ava reports that he hasn’t been on social media? Panic level rises. How long do I wait before I contact the police? Ava tells me to call the police right now. She tells me if he isn't answering his phone or texts it’s because he isn't safe and not to wait any longer. I can’t think straight. I am sobbing, my heart is pounding. I tell Norm he has to take over. He takes me back to the court house where we had just been touring and we tell them what has happened and we need to contact the police. Everyone was so nice. They helped us get in touch with the police. I made Norm handle that. I stood against a wall sobbing and thinking horrible thoughts. Sinjin took his backpack. Did he run away? Is he unhappy? I don't think he is unhappy. After taking the information from Norm the police start searching for Sinjin. Two police officers arrive at the court house to talk to us. I tell the officer, “he knows this person from the internet, I know how that sounds, but I thought I did this in a safe way.” I go with one officer and Norm goes with another. I do not like that they are looking for my child in bushes. We are trying to get into find my iphone but his account is locked and we can’t get in. I know all my kids passwords so now I am convinced this has been done by some evil person.
After maybe ten minutes of riding with the officer my phone rings and it is Sinjin. He has no idea the cops are looking for him. He just called to tell me he is having yogurt. He did go to the yogurt place! Sirens on the officer speeds to the yogurt shop where Sinjin and his friend are in tears. I feel bad for her. She is worried she is in trouble. She leaves to walk home and the officer drives us back to our car. He takes a picture of the happy ending.
This is the part where I should feel relieved, but now I feel guilty. Guilty for ruining Sinjin’s fun day. Guilty that his friend left in tears. Guilty that I didn't just go to the stupid yogurt shop first.
Here is the thing, I explained this to Sinjin later. Why did I panic so quickly? Sinjin is trying to sort out who he is and right now he often wears a lot of makeup and dresses in girl clothing. I am fine with it, but a lot of people are not. There are people who feel they need to attack people like Sinjin. Not just with words, but with violence. I was worried about this whole meeting going into it for that reason. I worry about Sinjin and people wanting to hurt him. Norm and I even talked about it on our run this morning. I would not have been in a panic so quickly with my other two kids. But I sit at a constant elevated level of panic when it comes to Sinjin. And I know the statistics because I lecture about them in my psychology classes. Very few people are abducted by strangers. It is usually the other parent or another family member. But statistics don'r mean crap when you are worried about your child.
In the end, my gut feeling was right. Ell was a really nice person. She told me she kept telling Sinjin to get in touch with me, that he should check in because that is what her parents would expect. For whatever reason, Sinjin wasn’t getting my text message and I wasn’t getting his, because he was messaging me. It was a phone glitch that lead to all of this. A phone glitch and my elevated level of concern.
The police in Auburn were amazing. The people of Auburn were amazing. I was NOT amazing. I should have just gone to the yogurt shop.
I told Norm I wanted to get 15 miles done. He sounded dubious, but willing to give it a try. I always tell him that if he can't keep going to just tell me and we can cut it short. I was letting him set the pace since this is my easy day. And I definitely tend to run to fast on my easy days with out him to keep me in check. It’s not really an ego thing, more the fact that I know I could be done so much quicker.
During I run I commented to Norm that this trip nothing had really gone wrong so I should be having fun, but I wasn’t really. I will come to regret this.
We ran 12.5 miles and then walked 1.5 miles. Norm was doing great and ran about an 8:30 pace the whole time, but at 12.5 the wheels came off his wagon and he jumped on the struggle bus. Oh well, we had a nice chat and eventually arrived at the apartment.
Today we were driving to Auburn for Sinjin to meet a friend he had made online. If you were in judgment of my parenting before, get ready to shake your head thusly. This is a douzy of a tail. I actually thought about leaving it out. Partly because it is personal about Sinjin and partly because I look pretty bad, but I talk about my period all the time, might as well tell you about this. (FYI - Sinjin read this and gave his approval.)
I had lectured Sinjin about being safe. We were meeting in a public place. I would be close by. We meet Ell at the park in Auburn. We talked for a few minutes and she seemed sweet. I felt good after meeting her. The kids told me they were going to the farmer’s market and to get yogurt. The last thing I said to Sinjin was, “if I text you, you better answer.” He said yes and off we all went.
About 30 minutes after we left Sinjin I texted and asked if everything was okay. No response. I waited a bit and texted again. Nothing. I tried calling. No answer. Now I am starting to worry. Why isn't he answering his phone? I texted Ava and told her he wasn’t answering, could she try? Meanwhile Norm and I rush over to the farmer’s market. It’s been about an hour since we left him and no one can reach him. The farmer’s market is closing up and he is not there. I am in a panic at this point. I talk to Ava. We walk through downtown Aubrun. I don't see him. Do I go into every store? I look up the yogurt. Where is the yougurt shop? It says it is .65 miles a way. I tell Norm, “They didn't go get yogurt! Sinjin would never walk that far.” Ava reports that he hasn’t been on social media? Panic level rises. How long do I wait before I contact the police? Ava tells me to call the police right now. She tells me if he isn't answering his phone or texts it’s because he isn't safe and not to wait any longer. I can’t think straight. I am sobbing, my heart is pounding. I tell Norm he has to take over. He takes me back to the court house where we had just been touring and we tell them what has happened and we need to contact the police. Everyone was so nice. They helped us get in touch with the police. I made Norm handle that. I stood against a wall sobbing and thinking horrible thoughts. Sinjin took his backpack. Did he run away? Is he unhappy? I don't think he is unhappy. After taking the information from Norm the police start searching for Sinjin. Two police officers arrive at the court house to talk to us. I tell the officer, “he knows this person from the internet, I know how that sounds, but I thought I did this in a safe way.” I go with one officer and Norm goes with another. I do not like that they are looking for my child in bushes. We are trying to get into find my iphone but his account is locked and we can’t get in. I know all my kids passwords so now I am convinced this has been done by some evil person.
After maybe ten minutes of riding with the officer my phone rings and it is Sinjin. He has no idea the cops are looking for him. He just called to tell me he is having yogurt. He did go to the yogurt place! Sirens on the officer speeds to the yogurt shop where Sinjin and his friend are in tears. I feel bad for her. She is worried she is in trouble. She leaves to walk home and the officer drives us back to our car. He takes a picture of the happy ending.
This is the part where I should feel relieved, but now I feel guilty. Guilty for ruining Sinjin’s fun day. Guilty that his friend left in tears. Guilty that I didn't just go to the stupid yogurt shop first.
Here is the thing, I explained this to Sinjin later. Why did I panic so quickly? Sinjin is trying to sort out who he is and right now he often wears a lot of makeup and dresses in girl clothing. I am fine with it, but a lot of people are not. There are people who feel they need to attack people like Sinjin. Not just with words, but with violence. I was worried about this whole meeting going into it for that reason. I worry about Sinjin and people wanting to hurt him. Norm and I even talked about it on our run this morning. I would not have been in a panic so quickly with my other two kids. But I sit at a constant elevated level of panic when it comes to Sinjin. And I know the statistics because I lecture about them in my psychology classes. Very few people are abducted by strangers. It is usually the other parent or another family member. But statistics don'r mean crap when you are worried about your child.
In the end, my gut feeling was right. Ell was a really nice person. She told me she kept telling Sinjin to get in touch with me, that he should check in because that is what her parents would expect. For whatever reason, Sinjin wasn’t getting my text message and I wasn’t getting his, because he was messaging me. It was a phone glitch that lead to all of this. A phone glitch and my elevated level of concern.
The police in Auburn were amazing. The people of Auburn were amazing. I was NOT amazing. I should have just gone to the yogurt shop.
Sunday:
We were suppose to run 5 miles today. I wanted to take Norm to see the Rose Garden at Capitol Park and we wanted to run the neighborhood by the zoo. But my head would not turn off. I spent 12am to 3am awake and beating myself up. I feel so guilty. I messed up Sinjin’s day. I wasted the time of the police. I am haunted by the look on his friends face. Why am I such a terrible adult? At 3am I turned the alarm off and finally fell asleep.
At 6am we got up and got some coffee. We packed up the car and headed for Utah. We will stay the night in Provo and finish the drive on Monday.
It is a long boring drive! We alternated between listening to the Lore Podcast, Outside Magazine Podcast and NPR when we could get it. We stayed at the Hampton Inn I stayed at when I was here with Jubilee. I knew where it was at and that it was close to food. And that it was clean. A little pricey, but I need a good nights sleep.
We were suppose to run 5 miles today. I wanted to take Norm to see the Rose Garden at Capitol Park and we wanted to run the neighborhood by the zoo. But my head would not turn off. I spent 12am to 3am awake and beating myself up. I feel so guilty. I messed up Sinjin’s day. I wasted the time of the police. I am haunted by the look on his friends face. Why am I such a terrible adult? At 3am I turned the alarm off and finally fell asleep.
At 6am we got up and got some coffee. We packed up the car and headed for Utah. We will stay the night in Provo and finish the drive on Monday.
It is a long boring drive! We alternated between listening to the Lore Podcast, Outside Magazine Podcast and NPR when we could get it. We stayed at the Hampton Inn I stayed at when I was here with Jubilee. I knew where it was at and that it was close to food. And that it was clean. A little pricey, but I need a good nights sleep.
