Monday:
I can’t believe how good I felt today! I was so happy to hop out of bed and find out that I wasn’t sore at all. We started out running easy, but I was feeling good so I wanted to see if I could push it bit. I was able to push the pace and still feel really good. Poor Norm! I think he assumed I would feel a bit tired, maybe sore, and we would run slow.
I haven’t really talked about cross training, but I am a big believer in weights and yoga for staying injury free. I like get weights in 3 times a week, but right now I am only get to do weights 2 times a week. I make sure to incorporate plyo and lots of core work. This usually takes me a total of 25 to 30 minutes. As for the yoga, I love it, but I just don't have the time right now. My current stretching program involves sitting in bed and stretching while I chat with Norm before bed. I mean, it’s better than nothing. So far it seems to be working okay. I know I have to keep my IT band happy or I will pay the price.
Tuesday:
I made it out the door in record time this morning. Norm didn't budge when the alarm went off so I let him sleep and went out on own. This was probably a good thing because I was able to get 7 miles done instead of just 6. Yes, I am implying that my husband is slow.
My running clothes were in the dryer and when I reached in I pulled out my running skirt. That I have never run in. Someone gave it to me, but I only wear it to run errands or hang out around the house. I have never really understood running skirts. In my daily life, I pretty much only wear skirts and dresses. I love a full fun skirt! But a running skirt? I know some people love them, but I don't want to feel girly when I run. I want to feel tough. The skirt doesn’t scream tough to me. But this morning I thought, what the hell. I felt stupid walking around, but once I started running I never really thought about being in a skirt. The only time I didn't like it was when I stopped for the bathroom. On the run today I stopped at the visitor’s center so I was using an actual bathroom. It was kinda hard to get the skirt pulled up and everything in the right place once I was sweating. If I had been on the trail and trying to get my pants up quick, this would have been an issue. And there is too much material to just pull things to the side and do your thing. So, I might wear the skirt again for a short training run where I have access to a bathroom, but it’s not likely to make it in to heavy rotation. It will probably just stay my Costco shopping skirt.
I really did not want to leave for my 2nd run. Not because my legs were tired or because I was tired, or because I had a lot of work to do. I just felt lazy. I wanted to lay in my bed and watch crap TV. But, I got myself dressed and out the door. The wind looked crazy, but it wasn’t that bad really.
I decided to sign up for the Sinister 54K this weekend. It’s a good way to make myself run in the dark, which I hate to do. It’s also a good way to get in a long run. And it is also a good way to make myself run at a different time of day.
Wednesday:
I felt good this morning. Norm went with me so I promised to keep the pace easy especially since we were doing some climbing. It actually felt cool out this morning. I know we don't have many more mornings of that. My family has been complaining constantly about the heat. All they do is whine about wanting to be back in Colorado. I have zero sympathy! Last summer I tried to convince everything that we should stay and not come back. All I got was a lot of crying. They had their chance.
Norm took a spill and we had to spend some time pulling stickers out of his hair and shirt, but the damage to his body was minimal. Just a nasty cut on the palm of his hand. I asked if he wanted to go home and he said “we are so far from home we might as well finish.” But we weren’t far from home, it was only about 2.5 miles from where we were stopped. The great thing about where we live is that we can run 20 or more miles but never be more than 2 or 3 miles from house just by dropping off the trail and onto the road. It’s a blessing and curse. We something goes wrong, you can be home fairly quickly and easy. But it also means it’s easy to bag a run if just want to quit.
I also decided to sign up for Hotfoot Hamster. No climbing, but 12 hours of running over night is good practice for my 100 mile race (or at least that is what I am telling myself).
Thursday:
I was so hungry all day yesterday. I could not get enough to eat! And also sleepy. Not a great combination for a second grade teacher. Mrs. Pham might have been a little less patient yesterday. Oops!
I am not doing so great keeping up regular life. This house is a mess, I am buying groceries every day by making a quick run to the store in the evening, and I have 198 unread emails.
Since I changed up my schedule for the next 2 weeks I gave myself a rest day today. The next 3 days are going tough and full of running. Instead of a 7 mile run I am drinking champagne and working to plan our summer trip. Trying to plan a trip that fits in my training with the things the kids want to do is no easy task. Thank G-d for Air BNB! I booked our place in LA and we were able to rent a house 4 blocks from Ava’s friend that she is going to Anime conference with in July. We also got a place booked for my 100 mile race. It’s a huge relief to have that part done.
Friday:
Why when I have a headache over night do I just think it will go away while I sleep? It never does! I woke up with the worst headache. Probably allergy related. The winds in Phoenix have been in high gear all week. I got up, took some Tylenol and made my coffee. My head hurt so bad I couldn't even bear to look at my phone to read emails or catch up on social media. I just sat there sipping coffee and hoping my head would start to feel better. When I left my head was still pounding, which made it easy to take it easy. I took a trail that we don’t often take because there is so much walking. But I was happy to do some hiking. Eventually my head felt a bit better, but I never felt great so I just took it easy and got the miles done. It was lucky that the temps were a bit cooler and there was good cloud cover. Made it easier to run with a headache.
Norm and I had a talk last week about how I have reached the point where I can't cut something short because I don't feel great and make it up later. 1. I am running too many miles to just add a few on here and there. 2. I need to get use to running when I don’t want to run because I am sure during my 100 race there will be times when I have to continue even though I don’t want to keep going.
I had been looking for another 50 mile race and I might have found one. I’m looking at the Squaw Peak 50 miler in Provo, Utah. Kind of a pain to get there, but it fits what I am looking for as a training run. I’ll probably sign up after I dink some wine tonight. Wine usually leads to me deciding to do something I am not sure about.
Off to get in a 15 minute nap before I have to teach the little people.
Saturday:
I woke up to major allergy problems. They only got worse. My poor Saturday class, I couldn't stop blowing my nose and sneezing. I didn't want to take an allergy pill because I always feel drugged for hours, but there was no way I was gong to run without an allergy pill. I took an advil allergy, the one I can function on the best, and then slept for an hour. I was going to the race early because Brandi needed to be there at 4pm, but neither of us wanted to drive at home alone late at night.
I don’t know why I hate running at night so much. It’s always been fine. But I dread it. This race was just meant to be a training run to practice running at night and what worked and what didn't with my headlamp. I didn’t really want to try to run too fast, it was another high mileage week, but I did want to try to get this 1st loop done before it got dark so I would have a chance to clearly see where I was going.
I did get the first loop done in the daylight. I turned my light on when it got dusky because that is actually the worse time for me. That not quite light, not quite dark makes it terribly hard for me to see well. I went out for my second loop and it was quickly getting dark. I spent the whole second loop having a massive panic attack. I couldn’t see anything. At the aid station I gave them my hat because Norm once said that he thought the brim of my hat was blocking my light. Now I can’t see and the freaking headlamp keeps falling down my face. When I finally got to the start/finish line Hayley and Norm where there. I lost it. Lots of F bombs. I was bent over ugly face crying. I had no intention of going back out again. I couldn’t see. Hayley ran to get me a second head lamp. Norm asked if I had the bright setting on or not. “How the F**k do I know?” I yelled at him. This is one of the other things I hate about this headlamp. It’s suppose to have this simple one touch function. It works well for everyone in my house, but never works for me. There is no explanation. Brandi even had me practice with her before the race and it worked fine, but I suspect that there had been a problem and I was on the lowlight setting while I was running. Norm got the brought setting on and I could tell a difference. I carried one light in my hand and had the other on my head, but my hat was still at the aid station so I had to wait a couple miles to get that. At the aid station I grabbed my hat so my headlamp would stop sliding down my face. The other fun development was that I couldn't stop coughing. I don’t know if it was my allergies, the dirt from the wind or due to the panic attack, but the cough was constant. I was done. I knew there was no way I was going out for another loop, much less three more loops. It was a training run to work things and out and what I had worked out was that this headlamp was not going to cut it.
I will say that the energy at this night run was amazing! This was my first Aravaipa night run and it was clear that every one was loving the event. If you haven't trued one, you should do a night run.
I got home around midnight. Ate some dinner and went to bed. Because I only did half of the race, my mileage was going to be off and I would need to run 34 miles on Sunday. Norm was still working until 3am so my youngest came to lay in bed with me and we watched tv until I fell asleep.
Sunday:
I never stay up until midnight. I could not wake up and ended up sleeping in until about 9am. I had some coffee and laid around watching the news before finally crawling out of bed and heading out for a run at 10am. There was no way I was running 34 miles, or 24 miles. I am kind of amazed that I made it 14 miles. It was 14 miles of my head playing a tape that sounded something like this, “you suck at this, why do you keep wasting your time and money, you are never going to be able to run well at night, this 100 mile race is going to be a disaster, don’t even bother trying to run this race, everyone else can use a headlamp and not have a panic attack, what the hell is wrong with you.” 14 miles of me telling me how much I suck. Good times.
By the end of the run I no longer wanted to run the 100 mile race. Forget it. I decided to come home and sign up for Squaw Peak 50 mile race and make that my focus. I really want to run a good 50 mile race. Maybe this will be the one.
On a personal note. I have decided to leave the PhD program at Grand Canyon University. It has become exceeding clear to me that no one cares about my success as a student. What they do care about is my money. I could write a whole blog about how terrible of an experience it has been. Most recently, my methodologist refused to read my corrections because I do not have an LDP (this something set up on the Grand Canyon site), but GCU will not set up an LDP until you have a content chair. No one the list I was given even responded to my request to be my content chair. Everyone else I have asked has said no. I paid $1900 for a class where I made corrections and the methodologist, supported by the university, refused to look at my work. What was that money for? I get that writing a dissertation is difficult, but I am constantly up against things that are beyond my control. I have worked so hard and dedicated so much time. I am terribly sad and frustrated, but I know this is the right decision.
I can’t believe how good I felt today! I was so happy to hop out of bed and find out that I wasn’t sore at all. We started out running easy, but I was feeling good so I wanted to see if I could push it bit. I was able to push the pace and still feel really good. Poor Norm! I think he assumed I would feel a bit tired, maybe sore, and we would run slow.
I haven’t really talked about cross training, but I am a big believer in weights and yoga for staying injury free. I like get weights in 3 times a week, but right now I am only get to do weights 2 times a week. I make sure to incorporate plyo and lots of core work. This usually takes me a total of 25 to 30 minutes. As for the yoga, I love it, but I just don't have the time right now. My current stretching program involves sitting in bed and stretching while I chat with Norm before bed. I mean, it’s better than nothing. So far it seems to be working okay. I know I have to keep my IT band happy or I will pay the price.
Tuesday:
I made it out the door in record time this morning. Norm didn't budge when the alarm went off so I let him sleep and went out on own. This was probably a good thing because I was able to get 7 miles done instead of just 6. Yes, I am implying that my husband is slow.
My running clothes were in the dryer and when I reached in I pulled out my running skirt. That I have never run in. Someone gave it to me, but I only wear it to run errands or hang out around the house. I have never really understood running skirts. In my daily life, I pretty much only wear skirts and dresses. I love a full fun skirt! But a running skirt? I know some people love them, but I don't want to feel girly when I run. I want to feel tough. The skirt doesn’t scream tough to me. But this morning I thought, what the hell. I felt stupid walking around, but once I started running I never really thought about being in a skirt. The only time I didn't like it was when I stopped for the bathroom. On the run today I stopped at the visitor’s center so I was using an actual bathroom. It was kinda hard to get the skirt pulled up and everything in the right place once I was sweating. If I had been on the trail and trying to get my pants up quick, this would have been an issue. And there is too much material to just pull things to the side and do your thing. So, I might wear the skirt again for a short training run where I have access to a bathroom, but it’s not likely to make it in to heavy rotation. It will probably just stay my Costco shopping skirt.
I really did not want to leave for my 2nd run. Not because my legs were tired or because I was tired, or because I had a lot of work to do. I just felt lazy. I wanted to lay in my bed and watch crap TV. But, I got myself dressed and out the door. The wind looked crazy, but it wasn’t that bad really.
I decided to sign up for the Sinister 54K this weekend. It’s a good way to make myself run in the dark, which I hate to do. It’s also a good way to get in a long run. And it is also a good way to make myself run at a different time of day.
Wednesday:
I felt good this morning. Norm went with me so I promised to keep the pace easy especially since we were doing some climbing. It actually felt cool out this morning. I know we don't have many more mornings of that. My family has been complaining constantly about the heat. All they do is whine about wanting to be back in Colorado. I have zero sympathy! Last summer I tried to convince everything that we should stay and not come back. All I got was a lot of crying. They had their chance.
Norm took a spill and we had to spend some time pulling stickers out of his hair and shirt, but the damage to his body was minimal. Just a nasty cut on the palm of his hand. I asked if he wanted to go home and he said “we are so far from home we might as well finish.” But we weren’t far from home, it was only about 2.5 miles from where we were stopped. The great thing about where we live is that we can run 20 or more miles but never be more than 2 or 3 miles from house just by dropping off the trail and onto the road. It’s a blessing and curse. We something goes wrong, you can be home fairly quickly and easy. But it also means it’s easy to bag a run if just want to quit.
I also decided to sign up for Hotfoot Hamster. No climbing, but 12 hours of running over night is good practice for my 100 mile race (or at least that is what I am telling myself).
Thursday:
I was so hungry all day yesterday. I could not get enough to eat! And also sleepy. Not a great combination for a second grade teacher. Mrs. Pham might have been a little less patient yesterday. Oops!
I am not doing so great keeping up regular life. This house is a mess, I am buying groceries every day by making a quick run to the store in the evening, and I have 198 unread emails.
Since I changed up my schedule for the next 2 weeks I gave myself a rest day today. The next 3 days are going tough and full of running. Instead of a 7 mile run I am drinking champagne and working to plan our summer trip. Trying to plan a trip that fits in my training with the things the kids want to do is no easy task. Thank G-d for Air BNB! I booked our place in LA and we were able to rent a house 4 blocks from Ava’s friend that she is going to Anime conference with in July. We also got a place booked for my 100 mile race. It’s a huge relief to have that part done.
Friday:
Why when I have a headache over night do I just think it will go away while I sleep? It never does! I woke up with the worst headache. Probably allergy related. The winds in Phoenix have been in high gear all week. I got up, took some Tylenol and made my coffee. My head hurt so bad I couldn't even bear to look at my phone to read emails or catch up on social media. I just sat there sipping coffee and hoping my head would start to feel better. When I left my head was still pounding, which made it easy to take it easy. I took a trail that we don’t often take because there is so much walking. But I was happy to do some hiking. Eventually my head felt a bit better, but I never felt great so I just took it easy and got the miles done. It was lucky that the temps were a bit cooler and there was good cloud cover. Made it easier to run with a headache.
Norm and I had a talk last week about how I have reached the point where I can't cut something short because I don't feel great and make it up later. 1. I am running too many miles to just add a few on here and there. 2. I need to get use to running when I don’t want to run because I am sure during my 100 race there will be times when I have to continue even though I don’t want to keep going.
I had been looking for another 50 mile race and I might have found one. I’m looking at the Squaw Peak 50 miler in Provo, Utah. Kind of a pain to get there, but it fits what I am looking for as a training run. I’ll probably sign up after I dink some wine tonight. Wine usually leads to me deciding to do something I am not sure about.
Off to get in a 15 minute nap before I have to teach the little people.
Saturday:
I woke up to major allergy problems. They only got worse. My poor Saturday class, I couldn't stop blowing my nose and sneezing. I didn't want to take an allergy pill because I always feel drugged for hours, but there was no way I was gong to run without an allergy pill. I took an advil allergy, the one I can function on the best, and then slept for an hour. I was going to the race early because Brandi needed to be there at 4pm, but neither of us wanted to drive at home alone late at night.
I don’t know why I hate running at night so much. It’s always been fine. But I dread it. This race was just meant to be a training run to practice running at night and what worked and what didn't with my headlamp. I didn’t really want to try to run too fast, it was another high mileage week, but I did want to try to get this 1st loop done before it got dark so I would have a chance to clearly see where I was going.
I did get the first loop done in the daylight. I turned my light on when it got dusky because that is actually the worse time for me. That not quite light, not quite dark makes it terribly hard for me to see well. I went out for my second loop and it was quickly getting dark. I spent the whole second loop having a massive panic attack. I couldn’t see anything. At the aid station I gave them my hat because Norm once said that he thought the brim of my hat was blocking my light. Now I can’t see and the freaking headlamp keeps falling down my face. When I finally got to the start/finish line Hayley and Norm where there. I lost it. Lots of F bombs. I was bent over ugly face crying. I had no intention of going back out again. I couldn’t see. Hayley ran to get me a second head lamp. Norm asked if I had the bright setting on or not. “How the F**k do I know?” I yelled at him. This is one of the other things I hate about this headlamp. It’s suppose to have this simple one touch function. It works well for everyone in my house, but never works for me. There is no explanation. Brandi even had me practice with her before the race and it worked fine, but I suspect that there had been a problem and I was on the lowlight setting while I was running. Norm got the brought setting on and I could tell a difference. I carried one light in my hand and had the other on my head, but my hat was still at the aid station so I had to wait a couple miles to get that. At the aid station I grabbed my hat so my headlamp would stop sliding down my face. The other fun development was that I couldn't stop coughing. I don’t know if it was my allergies, the dirt from the wind or due to the panic attack, but the cough was constant. I was done. I knew there was no way I was going out for another loop, much less three more loops. It was a training run to work things and out and what I had worked out was that this headlamp was not going to cut it.
I will say that the energy at this night run was amazing! This was my first Aravaipa night run and it was clear that every one was loving the event. If you haven't trued one, you should do a night run.
I got home around midnight. Ate some dinner and went to bed. Because I only did half of the race, my mileage was going to be off and I would need to run 34 miles on Sunday. Norm was still working until 3am so my youngest came to lay in bed with me and we watched tv until I fell asleep.
Sunday:
I never stay up until midnight. I could not wake up and ended up sleeping in until about 9am. I had some coffee and laid around watching the news before finally crawling out of bed and heading out for a run at 10am. There was no way I was running 34 miles, or 24 miles. I am kind of amazed that I made it 14 miles. It was 14 miles of my head playing a tape that sounded something like this, “you suck at this, why do you keep wasting your time and money, you are never going to be able to run well at night, this 100 mile race is going to be a disaster, don’t even bother trying to run this race, everyone else can use a headlamp and not have a panic attack, what the hell is wrong with you.” 14 miles of me telling me how much I suck. Good times.
By the end of the run I no longer wanted to run the 100 mile race. Forget it. I decided to come home and sign up for Squaw Peak 50 mile race and make that my focus. I really want to run a good 50 mile race. Maybe this will be the one.
On a personal note. I have decided to leave the PhD program at Grand Canyon University. It has become exceeding clear to me that no one cares about my success as a student. What they do care about is my money. I could write a whole blog about how terrible of an experience it has been. Most recently, my methodologist refused to read my corrections because I do not have an LDP (this something set up on the Grand Canyon site), but GCU will not set up an LDP until you have a content chair. No one the list I was given even responded to my request to be my content chair. Everyone else I have asked has said no. I paid $1900 for a class where I made corrections and the methodologist, supported by the university, refused to look at my work. What was that money for? I get that writing a dissertation is difficult, but I am constantly up against things that are beyond my control. I have worked so hard and dedicated so much time. I am terribly sad and frustrated, but I know this is the right decision.
Before the whole thing went to shit.
